Andrew Brunson was on the verge of suicide in prison

Of all places, I had lunch with Norine and Andrew Brunson In restaurantsrant Miklagaard in Copenhagen. Miklagaard was the name, Vikings used for Constantinople, as Istanbul was called in its Byzantine (Christian) e) period.

Before Media coverage. Turkey's imprisonment of Pastor Andrew Brunson, urged Mission Possible to intercede for him. In addition. sent Danes through the Danish European Mission hundreds of letters of appeal to the Turkish Ministry of Interior requesting, Andrew was released.

Brunson thank you very much for this support

Andrew says: "We would like to thank the supporters of the Danish European Mission and everyone else, who have been praying for us. I definitely needed your prayers.. The helped keep me going in prison, so I'm very grateful. I also want to, I want you to know that your prayers helped me get out of Turkey, but God did something much bigger than that - he used me like a magnet, that attracted prayer for this region.En Today you will see that I was involved in something much bigger than getting me out of prison. God will use this to bring harvest."

Norine Adds: "You need to know, How grateful we are. We would like to, We could thank you all face to face, but this is the best, we can do, so if we meet you, say hello to us, Tell them you prayed,and we want to give you a hug and thank you."

Did you experience the tangible presence of God in prison?

"A few years ago, we changed Norines and my ministry evolved as we began to experience more of God's presence. I was thirstyafter his glory, and we experienced miracles, and that the Lord revealed himself to us. We chased God to find han's presence. We wanted to hear han's voice. To know han's presence. We did church planting. We had a house of prayer, but the only focus was to be near ham.

Some people have said to me:Andrew, God loves you so much, that he sent you to prison for 2 years so it was just you and him. Just the two of you together.. That sounds really great, just me and him. Let me tell you You, what is i trulypresent happened.

First I was put in solitary confinement, and I was scared. I knew that, that there was a strong spiritual power, that kept me there, and I didn't know, when I was released. I was alone, locked in a room. No books, no paper, no pencil. It was just me and a bed. During the first week in solitary confinement, I actually felt the presence of God. I was very scared, but I sought comfort in, that the Lord was close to me. I thought., that maybe I should write a book with the title: NoWeather - the basic need.

After a few days, I completely lost the sense of God's presence. He blev remained silent and stayed silent for two years. I could not believe it."

How did you experience it?

"I was desperate for his presence, but I couldn't sense him. So I cried out to God in my longing, but it was like talking to a wall. I felt completely overwhelmed.abandoned you. "

Was in jail with 20 strongly devout Muslims

In the two years that Andrew Brunsen was imprisoned, he spent a long time in a cell in a high-security prison. Here he was locked up with 20 fellow Muslim prisoners. The bath and recited KThe orans in shifts and encouraged each other to pray.

"I missed being with blot one Christian. They did not understand my suffering, doubts and questions. The reason why, that they could not understand it, was because I have a different expectation of God. God describes himself as a father. That makes me His son. He also describes himself as a jealous husband and I am the object of his passion and love. Men Which father is silent, when his son calls for help? So I couldn't understand the distance, and I couldn't understand the silence from him, Who loved me."

Did you have a Bible in prison?

"It was a struggle to get a Bible and it was several months before I got a Bible."

NorineHow did your life go on?

"Andrew was my top priority. I mobilized prayers, tried to get him out through diplomatic channels and looked for ways to encourage him. Our children were far away from us, which was hard," recalls Norine with a serious look on his face.

Andrew indskyder: "We were allowed to meet every other month, for 35 minutes at a time, separated by glass. She was the only one, who listened to me, spoke truth to me and corrected me."

So behind every strong man, there is an even stronger woman?

"Yes, she is a lioness," Andrew says with a smile.

Where did you find your power? Norine?

"Sometimes I had the strength for more, sometimes less. We had a church that surrounded us with prayer, so I wasn't alone. I had to recognize that there were limits to what I could do. In the morning I prayed: Help methrough this day. I spent a lot of time in the presence of God, both in prayer and in silence. I asked, how can I help Andrew when I am discouraged myself?"

What was it like to be together again as a married couple after your release?

"It's actually been easy, but I have some trauma from that time that I need to work through. It's made me a little harder to live with in some ways," says Andrew. "But it's great to be together again. She carried me through prison, so the intimacy continued even though we were apart. For example we read the same texts in Bibelen while I was in prison".

Norine adds:"SEven if he has changedthen there is actually some stuff, I appreciate more about Andrew now than before. You may have become more compassionate with people, who are struggling," she says,as she sends a lovingly look to her husband."I used to be a project person,who thought about, what the price was for the service," narrator Andrew"I has now been broken, has seen my weakness and understands, if people can be afraid. I would still say that we should be willing to suffer, but perhaps put it more mildly."

Was it worst at night?

"I had demonic nightmares at nightbut days was also tough as I had nothing to do. There was No books.I was afraid of going insane. There were times when I slipped into insanity but pulled myself back. I contemplated suicide so I was sure I didn't lose my faith during mental illness. I remembered Jesus saying: tear out your eye if it offends you. It is better to go to heaven one-eyed. From this erroneous thinking, I thought it would be better to go to heaven."

It is interesting, you don't just talk about it, you experienced during imprisonment as persecution, but also as an ordeal anyone can experience?

"Yes, some experience similar trials, but not in a

context of persecution. The circumstances of ours trials may be different, but the things, that are tested in ourIt heart, are the same – for the human heartr are the same. I emphasize that your ordeal is enough for you, more than enough for that Knock you down. It doesn't make sense to compare trials, except to encourage others and tell them that someone has come through the."

Have you seen sides of God, you haven't seen before?

"Before, we had I not seen God do something very big and miraculous. I had seen healings, but not him actually doing something very big. That he started a worldwide prayer movement, that presidents were talking about my cause. In one magazine it was writtenI was the most expensive prisoner in the world when the Istanbul stock exchange lost 40 billion dollars in value (due to US sanctions, ed.). I said: God, you have really done something great. I've been surprised at how unpredictable God is."

"I thought., I was tough, but the challenges in prison exceeded my strength"

"My deepest sorrow was being separated from my wife, who is my closest friend, and being separated from my children. I feared that I would never see them again. I cried bitterly.

I cried more in those two years than I had gjorti the forowning 48. But my crisis of faith was not being persecuted; It was feeling abandoned. I was so worn out and tired of fighting. I wanted to be in himlen. I would rather be in heaven than in a Turkish prison. So I cried out to God and complained: Now as I walk in the valley of death. Now in my desperation. In the darkest hour of my life. God let me remind you that it eFor Jesus, I am suffering.

I thought, I was tenacious. I was an experienced missionary. I planted many churches, whichthedoes not, if thevil be popular in Muslim countries. I had been shot at. I've worked with refugees in war zones, but the challenges in prison were beyond my strength."

What did you learn in prison?

"I was weak and broken, and without his grace was I never got through it, but even in my most difficult time, when I felt abandoned, alone and God was silent, my cry was: I love you Jesus. That is precious. Cowstangible for the Lord. In prison, I realized that the most important thing is not is To sense the presence of God. Don't get me wrong! I still want the presence of God, and I seeks out I still need him. The deepest need for me was simple surrender, simple faithfulness, simple love.

The biographies I had read about Christian prisoners of conscience did not prepare me for this at all. I had a rosy picture of what it means to be persecuted for the sake of Christ. I had read about those who had been imprisoned and had encounters with Jesus or where angels came and strengthened them. I really wanted that. I begged and prayed for it every day, but it didn't happen.

What I've heard, After I came out of incarceratedeasyis, that many have an experience, that is similar to mine. That many, who are imprisoned for Jesus' sake have the same experience as me. Once in a while there might be a little light, but it willis rare.

We know he is there because he has said that he will never let us down or leave us. But if he is present, why can't I feel his presence? Where is the comfort? Where are the embracing arms?"

God had a question for me

"I was so focused on my own Questions, that they engulfed me, but God also had a question for me:Andrew, will you be offended or will you still love me? Will you still give your heart to me? Will you pass the test? God tests his sons and daughters. I am not saying, That God foryearcases evil, because he is not out to get us, and he is not the source of ourssuffering. But he uses suffering to test us, and it's true, that he gives difficult tasks to his children. De can be painful, for Because they can stretch us, Beyond what we thought, We could and beyond that, we expected. Think about those people, you look up to most in Bibelen. Paul, Davidand Daniel. These are some of the The Bible'sHeroes. I will mention Moses, Abraham, Joseph and David. Try it andThink about, what they've been through. Thewas through hard times, and they were friends of God. See how he Anyway treats them. All God's friends went through a time of trial, and here they experienced, responses were delayed, and that They felt betrayed and experienced God's silence. In that time of trial, God knew well,that They willthe struggle and that it would be a difficult time. Mbut he did it anyway, and they got through it, remained faithful and were not offendedof. They came out of it like leprechauns. And maybe that's actually why, They were friends with God.

Many go through the valley of trial, and if you have never been there, you will be thereto. Sometimes we thinkthat we are Very triumphant. We are the victoryde. I have the Holy Spirit, so of course I make it through it all.Mand Not everyone makes it through, because the Valley of Trials is filled with dead bones and skeletons. These are the bones of the faithful, who didn't pass the test. Not that they won't go to heaven, because that's something completely different, but they stopped in their vocation and ministry, and lost the closeness Community, they had with God. So maybe they're going to heaven, but they've missed out on those victories, as God would have, they were to experience. There is a presence, a deep friendship that only comes through being tested. Untested love, untested devotion, untested loyalty, is not proven. Untested love can be very real, sincere and heartfelt, but it doesn't have output to the testreader".