For just over 25 years ago, I met some Christian women who visited the women's prison where I was an inmate, Nasrin says.
I was in the prison's maximum-security unit for smuggling two kilos of narcotics across the border on my transit route to my home country.
In prison I had attained a leadership status among the other inmates because I was in charge of the drug sales.
I was a very violent person and often threatened the other inmates and smuggled various kinds of drugs into the prison by bribing the staff. Whenever there was a special event or a religious holiday period like Ramadan, I was always put in solitary confinement for the entire period, because that way they could be sure there wouldn't be any trouble.
The meeting with the Christian women in prison
One day, some Christian women came to the prison to hold classes. I was told that their teaching had a positive influence that could change my way of life. ”They also tell how God can help you to a better life,” I was told. I didn't believe that and thought, “such holy moralizing preachers,” and I began to despise them. One day, while other inmates were listening, I said, ”I won't talk to those self-righteous women when they come here. Because they make me feel bad.”
One reason I said that was also because I considered myself a Muslim, even though I wasn't a practicing Muslim. So I rejected their message because I believed their God was not the same as the one I had heard about when my father read aloud from the Quran.
But one day I went along to their class anyway, because I was curious.
I sat at the back of the room and listened, but once again the anger toward them welled up inside me, and I began to taunt them until the guards led me back to my cell.
Shortly after, I was put in solitary confinement for violence against another inmate, and there I got tuberculosis because I was in a damp prison cell. I was transferred to the infirmary and got well again.
But the Christian women also came there and held a meeting in the infirmary. They recognized me and were happy to see me! I couldn't understand that at all, because I had only ever met them with contempt and condescending words.
”Why are you glad to see me, you know who I am after all. Everyone fears me,” I said.
”Yes, we know you well, but God does too, and he loves you despite who you are,” they said.
Then I went back to my old secure unit and continued my criminal career.
”She placed her hand on me and prayed in a calm voice. Suddenly it was as if a light shone very brightly in my eyes”
One day the Christian women came again and this time held their meeting outside under the open sky.
I had bribed the guards and was standing in the courtyard waiting for someone to throw a small lump of drugs over the wall when they suddenly arrived and started their meeting. That suited me very poorly, and I was nervous and waiting impatiently for them to finish.
When the meeting was over, they all left the place, and only I and one of the Christian women remained behind.
”What are you staring at? Why aren't you leaving? Everyone fears me, and you should too, I said.
She answered calmly: ”I'm not going anywhere until you let me pray for you, Nasrin.”.
I was taken aback by her answer. ”Ok,” I replied, ”but make it quick, if you promise to leave afterwards.”.
She placed her hand on me and prayed with a calm voice. Suddenly, it was as if a light was shining very brightly in my eyes. ”Why is there such a blinding light here? I can barely see you,” I said. ”What light?” she replied. ”You are the only one who can see that light. So it must be God's light that you can see.”
Then she said: “Jesus says `I am the light of the world´, so if you want that light to come into your life, you must accept Jesus into your heart”. I didn't answer, and then she left.
Shortly after, the signal horn sounded from the other side of the wall. I quickly replied with my password, and then a lump dropped down. I quickly took it, walked toward the door, stood still, thought for a moment, and then threw it into the trash can.
That was the last time I saw the Christian women in prison. I later found out it was because the prison didn't allow them to come anymore.
That same evening I knelt down and prayed in my dark prison cell. Suddenly it shone again in the same strong and blinding way. I stood up and felt a comfort and a warmth, and it shone even so brightly that it was as if the light was shining inside me. I felt a comfort, a peace, and a love! Things that I longed for, but did not know.
After a long time, the light went away, and I could not sleep. That night I understood that it was God who had come to me. In the following days I understood that I had a lot of darkness in me, that I was a sinner, and that God was light and holy. It was as if my own darkness made it even clearer.
Then I contacted another inmate in the prison who I knew had accepted the Christian women's teachings. I told her about my experience, and she told me that she had also experienced God coming to her in her prison cell.
She then told me about Jesus and what she knew about the Bible. After a few days, she asked me, “Do you want to accept Jesus and repent of your sin? The blood of Jesus can cleanse you from all your sins.”.
That same evening, I got down on my knees and accepted Jesus into my heart and repented of my sin, saying, “I do not want to go back to my sinful life, now I want to be with you Jesus.”.
Jesus changes Nasrin's life
I was in prison for several more years, but after that experience I stopped being a drug dealer, and because of my new life with Jesus, my life began to change.
One day I was pardoned and released early. But because I was not a citizen of the country, and they didn't want me to commit any more crimes, I was deported from the country for life.
I returned to my homeland and immediately started attending a church, and later I began serving in the church, and then in the church's rehabilitation work.
One day, while I was at church, the Christian woman who had prayed for me in prison suddenly came to visit. We recognized each other immediately and were both equally surprised, and when she found out that I had become a Christian in prison without her knowing it, she became even happier. ”God is great, and His ways are wondrous,” she said.
Today I love Jesus and serving Him, and God has given me a big heart for those who do not know Jesus.
I am deeply grateful to God, who used the Christian women to bring His light into my life.
