{"id":3796,"date":"2019-12-12T19:19:02","date_gmt":"2019-12-12T18:19:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/forfulgtekristne.dk\/2019\/12\/12\/interview-andrew-brunson-var-paa-selvmordets-rand-i-faengslet\/"},"modified":"2024-04-17T11:21:15","modified_gmt":"2024-04-17T09:21:15","slug":"interview-andrew-brunson-was-on-the-verge-of-suicide-in-prison","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/forfulgtekristne.dk\/en\/2019\/12\/12\/interview-andrew-brunson-var-paa-selvmordets-rand-i-faengslet\/","title":{"rendered":"Interview: Andrew Brunson was on the verge of suicide in prison"},"content":{"rendered":"

Of all places, I had lunch with\u00a0<\/span>Norine<\/span>\u00a0and Andrew\u00a0<\/span>Brunson<\/span> In restaurants<\/span>rant\u00a0<\/span>Miklagaard<\/span>\u00a0in Copenhagen.\u00a0<\/span>Miklagaard<\/span>\u00a0was the name<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0Vikings used for Constantinople, as Istanbul was called in its Byzantine (Christian)<\/span>\"\"e) period.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Before\u00a0<\/span>Media coverage.<\/span>\u00a0Turkey's imprisonment of Pastor Andrew\u00a0<\/span>Brunson<\/span>,\u00a0<\/span>urged<\/span>\u00a0Mission Possible<\/span>\u00a0to intercede for him<\/span>. In addition.<\/span>\u00a0sent Danes<\/span>\u00a0through the Danish European Mission<\/span>\u00a0hundreds of letters of appeal to the Turkish Ministry of Interior requesting<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0Andrew was released.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Brunson<\/span><\/b>\u00a0thank you very much for this support<\/span><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Andrew says:\u00a0<\/span>\"<\/span>We would like to thank the supporters of the Danish European Mission and everyone else<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0who have been praying for us. I definitely needed your prayers.<\/span>. The<\/span>\u00a0helped keep me going in prison, so I'm very grateful. I also want to<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0I want you to know that your prayers helped me get out of Turkey, but God did something much bigger than that - he used me like a magnet<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that attracted prayer for this region<\/span>.<\/span><\/span>E<\/span>n\u00a0<\/span>Today you will see that\u00a0<\/span>I\u00a0<\/span>was involved in something much bigger than getting me out of prison. God will use this to bring harvest.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Norine<\/span>\u00a0Adds:\u00a0<\/span>\"<\/span>You need to know<\/span>,<\/span> How grateful we are<\/span>. We would like to<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0We could thank you all face to face, but this is the best<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0we can do, so if we meet you, say hello to us<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0Tell them you prayed<\/span>,<\/span>and we want to give you a hug and thank you.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Did you experience the tangible presence of God in prison?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"<\/span>A few years ago, we changed\u00a0<\/span>Norines<\/span>\u00a0and my ministry evolved as we began to experience more of God's presence. I was\u00a0<\/span>thirsty<\/span><\/span>after his glory<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0and we experienced miracles<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0and that the Lord revealed himself to us. We chased God to find\u00a0<\/span>h<\/span>an's presence. We wanted to hear\u00a0<\/span>h<\/span>an's voice. To know\u00a0<\/span>h<\/span>an's presence. We did church planting. We had a house of prayer, but the only focus was to be near\u00a0<\/span>h<\/span>am.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Some people have said to me<\/span>:<\/span><\/span>Andrew, God loves you so much<\/span><\/i>,<\/span><\/i>\u00a0that he sent you to prison for 2 years so it was just you and him. Just the two of you together.<\/span><\/i>. That sounds really great, just me and him. Let me tell you<\/span>\u00a0You,<\/span>\u00a0what is\u00a0<\/span>i\u00a0<\/span>truly<\/span>present<\/span>\u00a0happened.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

First I was put in solitary confinement<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0and I was scared. I knew that<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that there was a strong spiritual power<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that kept me there<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0and I didn't know<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0when I was released. I was alone, locked in a room. No books, no paper, no pencil. It was just me and a bed. During the first week in solitary confinement, I actually felt the presence of God. I was very scared, but I sought comfort in<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that the Lord was close to me. I thought.<\/span>,<\/span> that maybe I should write a book with the title: No<\/span>Weather - the basic need.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

After a few days, I completely lost the sense of God's presence.<\/a> He bl<\/span>ev remained silent and stayed silent for two years. I could not believe it.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

How did you experience it?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"<\/span>I was desperate for his presence, but I couldn't sense him. So I cried out to God in my longing, but it was like talking to a wall. I felt completely overwhelmed.<\/span>abandoned you.\u00a0<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Was in jail with 20 strongly devout Muslims<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

In the two years that Andrew\u00a0<\/span>Brunsen<\/span>\u00a0was imprisoned, he spent a long time in a cell in a high-security prison. Here he was locked up with 20 fellow Muslim prisoners.\u00a0<\/span>The bath<\/span>\u00a0and recited\u00a0<\/span>K<\/span>The orans in shifts<\/span>\u00a0and encouraged each other to pray<\/span>.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\"<\/span><\/i><\/b>I missed being with b<\/span>lot one Christian. They did not understand my suffering, doubts and questions. The reason why<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that they could not understand it<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0was because I have a different expectation of God. God describes himself as a father.\u00a0<\/span>That makes me<\/span>\u00a0His son. He also describes himself as a jealous husband and I am the object of his passion and love.\u00a0<\/span>Men<\/span>\u00a0Which father is silent<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0when his son calls for help? So I couldn't understand the distance<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0and I couldn't understand the silence from him<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0Who loved me.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Did you have a Bible in prison?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"It was a struggle to get a Bible and it was several months before I got a Bible.\" <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Norine<\/span><\/i><\/b>How did your life go on?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"Andrew was my top priority. I mobilized prayers, tried to get him out through diplomatic channels and looked for ways to encourage him. Our children were far away from us, which was hard,\" recalls\u00a0<\/span>Norine<\/span>\u00a0with a serious look on his face.\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Andrew indsk<\/span>yder: \"<\/span>We were allowed to meet every other month, for 35 minutes at a time<\/span>,\u00a0<\/span>separated by glass. She was the only one<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0who listened to me, spoke truth to me and corrected me.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/p>\n

So behind every strong man, there is an even stronger woman?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"<\/span>Yes, she is a lioness,<\/span>\"<\/span>\u00a0Andrew says with a smile.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Where did you find your power?\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/b>Norine<\/span><\/i><\/b>?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"Sometimes I had the strength for more, sometimes less. We had a church that surrounded us with prayer, so I wasn't alone. I had to recognize that there were limits to what I could do. In the morning I prayed: Help me<\/span>through this day. I spent a lot of time in the presence of God, both in prayer and in silence. I asked, how can I help Andrew when I am discouraged myself?\"\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

What was it like to be together again as a married couple after your release?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"It's actually been easy, but I have some trauma from that time that I need to work through. It's made me a little harder to live with in some ways,\" says Andrew. \"But it's great to be together again. She carried me through prison, so the intimacy continued even though we were apart.\u00a0<\/span>For example<\/span>\u00a0we read the same texts in Bib<\/span>e<\/span>len while I was in prison\".\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Norine<\/span>\u00a0adds<\/span>:<\/span><\/span>\"S<\/span>Even if he has changed<\/span>then there is<\/span>\u00a0actually some<\/span>\u00a0stuff<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0I appreciate more about Andrew<\/span>\u00a0now<\/span>\u00a0than before<\/span>.<\/span>\u00a0You may have become more compassionate with people<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0who are struggling<\/span>,\" she says<\/span>,<\/span>as she sends a\u00a0<\/span>lovingly\u00a0<\/span>look to\u00a0<\/span>her husband.<\/span><\/span>\"<\/span>I used to be a project person<\/span>,<\/span><\/span>who thought about<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0what the price was for the service<\/span>,<\/span>\"<\/span>\u00a0narrator\u00a0<\/span>Andrew<\/span><\/span>\"I<\/span>\u00a0has now been broken, has seen my weakness and understands<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0if people can be afraid. I would still say that we should be willing to suffer, but perhaps put it more mildly.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Was it worst at night?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"I<\/span>\u00a0had demonic nightmares at night<\/span>but<\/span>\u00a0days\u00a0<\/span>was\u00a0<\/span>also tough as I had nothing to do<\/span>. There was<\/span>\u00a0No books<\/span>.<\/span><\/span>I was afraid of going insane. There were times when I slipped into insanity but pulled myself back. I contemplated suicide so I was sure I didn't lose my faith during mental illness. I remembered Jesus saying: tear out your eye if it offends you. It is better to go to heaven one-eyed. From this erroneous thinking, I thought it would be better to go to heaven.\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

It is interesting<\/span><\/i><\/b>,<\/span><\/i><\/b>\u00a0you don't just talk about it<\/span><\/i><\/b>,<\/span><\/i><\/b>\u00a0you experienced during imprisonment as persecution, but also as an ordeal anyone can experience?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"<\/span>Yes, some experience similar trials, but not in a\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

context of persecution. The circumstances of our<\/span>s<\/span>\u00a0trials may be different, but the things<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that are tested in our<\/span>It<\/span>\u00a0heart, are the same<\/span>\u00a0-<\/span>\u00a0for the human heart<\/span>r<\/span>\u00a0are the same. I emphasize that your ordeal is enough for you, more than enough for\u00a0<\/span>that\u00a0<\/span>Knock you down. It doesn't make sense to compare trials, except to encourage others and tell them that someone has come through<\/span>\u00a0the<\/span>.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Have you seen sides of God<\/span><\/i><\/b>,<\/span><\/i><\/b>\u00a0you haven't seen before?<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"Before, we had\u00a0<\/span>I\u00a0<\/span>not seen God do something very big and miraculous. I had seen healings, but not him actually doing something very big. That he started a worldwide prayer movement, that presidents were talking about my cause.\u00a0<\/span>In one magazine it was written<\/span>I was the most expensive prisoner in the world when the Istanbul stock exchange lost 40 billion dollars in value (due to US sanctions, ed.). I said: God, you have really done something great. I've been surprised at how unpredictable God is.\"\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\"I thought.<\/span><\/i><\/b>,<\/span><\/i><\/b>\u00a0I was tough, but the challenges in prison exceeded my strength\"<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"My deepest sorrow was being separated from my wife, who is my closest friend, and being separated from my children. I feared that I would never see them again. I cried bitterly.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"I cried more in those two years than I <\/span>had\u00a0<\/span>gjor<\/span>t<\/span><\/span>i\u00a0<\/span>the for<\/span>owning\u00a0<\/span>48. But my crisis of faith was not being persecuted<\/span>;\u00a0<\/span>It was feeling abandoned. I was so worn out and tired of fighting. I wanted to be in\u00a0<\/span>h<\/span>imlen. I would rather be in heaven than in a Turkish prison. So I cried out to God and complained:\u00a0<\/span>Now as I walk in the valley of death. Now in my desperation. In the darkest hour of my life. God let me remind you that it <\/span><\/i>e<\/span><\/i>For Jesus, I am suffering.<\/span><\/i><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I thought<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0I was tenacious. I was an experienced missionary. I planted many churches, which<\/span>the<\/span><\/span>does not<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0if\u00a0<\/span>the<\/span><\/span>vi<\/span>l<\/span>\u00a0be popular in Muslim countries. I had been shot at. I've worked with refugees in war zones, but the challenges in prison were beyond my strength.<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

What did you learn in prison?\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"I was weak and broken, and without his grace\u00a0<\/span>was<\/span>\u00a0I never got through it, but even in my most difficult time, when I felt abandoned, alone and God was silent, my cry was: I love you Jesus. That is precious. Cow<\/span>s<\/span>tangible for the Lord. In prison, I realized that the most important thing is not<\/span>\u00a0is<\/span>\u00a0To sense the presence of God. Don't get me wrong! I still want the presence of God, and I\u00a0<\/span>seeks out<\/span>\u00a0I still need him. The deepest need for me was simple surrender, simple faithfulness, simple love.\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The biographies I had read about Christian prisoners of conscience did not prepare me for this at all. I had a rosy picture of what it means to be persecuted for the sake of Christ. I had read about those who had been imprisoned and had encounters with Jesus or where angels came and strengthened them. I really wanted that. I begged and prayed for it every day, but it didn't happen.\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

What I've heard<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0After I came out of\u00a0<\/span>incarcerated<\/span>easy<\/span>is<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that many have an experience<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that is similar to mine. That many<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0who are imprisoned for Jesus' sake have the same experience as me. Once in a while there might be a little light, but it\u00a0<\/span>will<\/span>is rare.\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

We know he is there because he has said that he will never let us down or leave us. But if he is present, why can't I feel his presence? Where is the comfort? Where are the embracing arms?<\/span>\"<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

God had a question for me<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"<\/span>I was so focused on my<\/span>\u00a0own<\/span>\u00a0Questions<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that they engulfed me, but God also had a question for me<\/span>:<\/span><\/span>Andrew, will you be offended or will you still love me? Will you still give your heart to me? Will you pass the test?<\/span><\/i>\u00a0God tests his sons and daughters. I am not saying<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0That God\u00a0<\/span>f<\/span>o<\/span>r<\/span>year<\/span>cases\u00a0<\/span>evil, because he is not out to get us<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0and he is not the source of our<\/span>s<\/span>suffering. But he uses suffering to test us, and it's true<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0that he gives difficult tasks to his children<\/span>. D<\/span>e\u00a0<\/span>can be painful,\u00a0<\/span>for\u00a0<\/span>Because they can stretch us<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0Beyond what we thought<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0We could and beyond that<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0we expected. Think about those people<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0you look up to most in Bib<\/span>e<\/span>len. Paul, David<\/span>and<\/span>\u00a0Daniel. These are some of the\u00a0<\/span>The Bible's<\/span><\/span>Heroes. I will mention Moses, Abraham, Joseph<\/span>\u00a0and<\/span>\u00a0David. Try it\u00a0<\/span>and<\/span>Think about<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0what they've been through.\u00a0<\/span>The<\/span><\/span>was<\/span>\u00a0through hard times, and they were friends of God. See how he\u00a0<\/span>Anyway\u00a0<\/span>treats them. All God's friends went through a time of trial, and here they experienced<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0responses were delayed, and<\/span>\u00a0that<\/span>\u00a0They felt betrayed and experienced God's silence. In that time of trial, God knew well<\/span>,<\/span><\/span>that\u00a0<\/span>They will<\/span>the<\/span>\u00a0struggle and that it would be a difficult time<\/span>. M<\/span>but he did it anyway<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0and they got through it<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0remained faithful and were not offended<\/span>of<\/span>. They came out of it like leprechauns. And maybe that's actually why<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0They were friends with God.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Many go through the valley of trial, and if you have never been there, you will be there<\/span>to<\/span>.<\/span>\u00a0Sometimes we think<\/span>that we are\u00a0<\/span>Very triumphant. We are the victory<\/span>d<\/span>e. I have the Holy Spirit<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0so of course I make it through it all<\/span>.<\/span><\/span>M<\/span>and\u00a0<\/span>Not everyone makes it through, because the Valley of Trials is filled with dead bones and skeletons. These are the bones of the faithful<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0who didn't pass the test. Not that they won't go to heaven, because that's something completely different, but they\u00a0<\/span>stopped in\u00a0<\/span>their vocation and ministry, and<\/span>\u00a0lost the closeness\u00a0<\/span>Community<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0they had with God. So maybe they're going to heaven, but they've missed out on those victories<\/span>,<\/span>\u00a0as God would have<\/span>,<\/span> they were to experience. There is a presence, a deep friendship that only\u00a0<\/span>comes through being tested. Untested love, untested devotion, untested loyalty, is not proven. Untested love can be very real, sincere and heartfelt, but it doesn't have\u00a0<\/span>out<\/span>put to the test<\/span>reader<\/span>\"<\/span>.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\"I don't need answers to my questions to have a relationship with you\"<\/span><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

I am\u00a0<\/span>doubts<\/span>oath<\/span><span data-cras\n<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In prison, Brunson not only experienced persecution, but also went through a deep crisis of faith. Through the ordeal, his friendship with God deepened.<\/p>","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":3800,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[104],"tags":[],"gamle_kategorier":[],"land":[87],"class_list":["post-3796","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fortalervirksomhed","land-tyrkiet","infinite-scroll-item","generate-columns","tablet-grid-50","mobile-grid-100","grid-parent","grid-33"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nAndrew Brunson var p\u00e5 selvmordets rand i f\u00e6ngslet | Dansk Europamission<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/forfulgtekristne.dk\/en\/2019\/12\/12\/interview-andrew-brunson-was-on-the-verge-of-suicide-in-prison\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Andrew Brunson var p\u00e5 selvmordets rand i f\u00e6ngslet | Dansk Europamission\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I f\u00e6ngslet oplevede Brunson ikke kun forf\u00f8lgelse, men gennemgik ogs\u00e5 en dyb troskrise. 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